


all the lovers we’ve taken in direct view of the enemy

by RagtimeCat



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Come Eating, Deepthroating, Dom/sub Undertones, Exhibitionism, F/M, Hate Sex, M/M, Masturbation, Mild humiliation kink, Multi, No Pregnancy, OT3, Outdoor Sex, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Polyamory, Rough Sex, Semi-Public Sex, Smut, Submissive Kylo Ren, Switch Finn, Switch Rey, TFA-era fandom vibes, Tags May Change, Threesome - F/M/M, Vaginal Sex, Voyeurism, if guilt is a kink they all have it, look i just wanted to write something horny and angsty, tfw you deepthroat your enemy out of spite
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-10
Updated: 2020-11-14
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:48:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 15,404
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26922379
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RagtimeCat/pseuds/RagtimeCat
Summary: After the battle on Starkiller Base, Finn and Rey part ways with the Resistance temporarily to train with Luke Skywalker. As busy as they are with their training—and with each other—they can’t stop themselves from thinking about Kylo Ren, nor can he keep away from them, either.And then they meet in battle, and things take another turn completely.
Relationships: Finn/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Finn/Rey (Star Wars), Finn/Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 9
Kudos: 20
Collections: Queerly Beloved Reylo Fics, The Sub!Ben Collection





	1. I

**Author's Note:**

> hello! i wanted to write some horny angsty finnreylo, channeling some TFA-era fandom vibes. i have no update schedule for this and tags and chapter counts are subject to change. very unbeta'd, but then again, the point of this is angsty finnreylo smut so ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

Finn and Rey part ways with the Resistance after the destruction of Starkiller Base so that they can go find Luke Skywalker and get some training in the Jedi arts, since neither of them has had any other opportunity to learn the ways of the Force.

(There was another offer that Rey will think about sometimes, even though she knows she shouldn’t. It’s a thought for late nights when she’s full of pent-up energy and so desperate for release that she allows herself to think about the ways those lessons could have ended, if the person offering them wasn’t so... _awful_.)

They learn very quickly that Luke Skywalker isn’t the man they’d thought he’d be. Rey is in favor of waiting him out, hovering around until he can’t ignore them any longer. “I’ve had plenty of practice waiting,” she points out while she and Finn are discussing their options. They’re seated at the powered-down dejarik table in the _Falcon_ , safe from the rain that’s drizzling down outside. As much as Rey wants to run around in it, delighting in the way water is falling from the sky in seemingly endless amounts, the pull to be in here with Finn is stronger.

Initially, she elected to stay in a stone hut in the little village, a constant reminder to Skywalker that he was no longer alone on the island. When he finally agrees, Finn suggests she bunk on the Falcon with him, Chewie, and R2-D2. “It can’t be comfortable up there,” Finn says. “Isn’t it cold and wet all the time?”

“I don’t mind,” she says, willing her cheeks not to heat when she thinks about how _wet_ things were this morning when she woke from a dream where she had Finn’s face between her thighs. “I’ve slept in worse conditions. I’m not sure I could get comfortable on an actual bed.” What she doesn’t tell him is that she’s afraid of the possibility that he can sense her desire if they’re in close quarters for long enough. She realized pretty quickly that she can sense Finn’s mood in the Force—when he’s annoyed with waiting, for example, or the excitement he feels when Skywalker finally agrees to train them—and she has no way of knowing how subconscious that is.

(Two weeks after their arrival on Ahch-To, Skywalker gives them a lesson on mental shielding. He’d cut himself off from the Force long before they’d met him, but he apparently decided that it was going to be easier if he had access to the Force. Rey’s cheeks are so hot she fears she’s about to combust when she considers why he felt the need to prioritize that particular lesson.)

“You’re not…” Finn says, pausing so that he can gauge her reaction before he finishes the question. “...Still thinking of going back to Jakku?”

The truth is, Rey doesn’t know what she’s thinking. When she and Finn had left Jakku aboard a ship that turned out to be the stuff of legends, she wanted nothing more than to go back and wait for her family. But now, the idea of going back to Jakku and resuming her life as a scavenger feels like trying to put on clothes that no longer fit quite right.

“We came here to bring Luke Skywalker back to fight with the Resistance,” she tells him, knowing it’s not actually an answer. “And that’s what we’re going to do.”

He nods, but says, “I know I asked this before, but are you sure about this? It doesn’t feel right, being stuck out here while everyone else is preparing to go up against the First Order.”

“They were evacuating D’Qar, same as us,” she reminds him. “Besides, we destroyed the First Order’s superweapon. You don’t think they’ll recover from that quickly, do you?”

Finn frowns. Rey has spent a lot of time memorizing his facial expressions in the week and a half she’s known him, and this is not her favorite. She likes it when he smiles, but she supposes that this isn’t the sort of conversation that inspires happiness anyway. “I was just a stormtrooper,” he says. “And I wasn’t even an important one, at that. Unfortunately, there’s a lot of information I wasn’t cleared for, and I’m afraid to find out what it was.”

They’re silent for a while after that. It’s not...uncomfortable, exactly. This is the most time Rey has spent around another person since she was a child. It feels strange, but not in a bad way. She likes spending time around Finn. The things they went through—escaping from Jakku and then from the First Order—have given them a bond she’s never shared with anyone before. The fact that he’s going to train as a Jedi right along with her only strengthens the connection between them.

Of course, there’s a topic they’ve both been reluctant to discuss, but Rey can’t hold back any longer. “Do you think he made it out alive?” she asks.

Finn must know who she’s referring to, but he asks, “Who?” as if he’s giving her an excuse to end this conversation before it starts.

“Kylo Ren.” His name feels strange in her mouth, like she’s saying something forbidden. And maybe she is. If Finn doesn’t want to talk about him, she’ll respect that, but Rey doubts she’s the only one wondering about him.

There’s silence for a moment as Finn considers his response. “I think we would have sensed something in the Force if he’d died,” he says quietly. “Don’t you?”

Rey nods, wondering if Finn feels the same shameful pull towards Ren that she does. They’ve been in each others’ heads, and that’s not something one simply walks away from. She tells herself it’s simply because she doesn’t understand how he could possibly turn his back on his family and the light side of the Force, but the curiosity runs deeper—and more physical—than that.

She’s no stranger to her body’s needs, having figured out years ago how to pleasure herself, all alone in the desert with illicit holos for inspiration. But this is something else. Instead of the nameless beings in the holoporn, her fantasies have taken a startlingly realistic turn. When she thinks about someone fucking her while she’s on her hands and knees, it’s Ren’s voice she hears from behind her, hissing _scavenger_ and offering promises to teach her things she’s not going to learn from his uncle. The shame of those fantasies is matched only in her guilt for the fantasies involving the closest friend she’s ever had. She may want to feel Ren pounding her from behind, but it’s Finn’s face she fantasizes about having between her thighs.

Fortunately, one of Rey’s many talents is her ability to compartmentalize; it’s all that’s keeping her from saying something to Finn that she can’t take back while they train together, day in and day out.

* * *

It takes some coaxing to convince Skywalker to teach them the ways of the Force. He’s dodgy when it comes to the topic of his nephew, something that Rey and Finn have discussed when Skywalker’s not around.

Even weeks after the battle on Starkiller Base, Finn can’t shake the knowledge of how the mighty Kylo Ren looks when he’s at the end of his rope. His face haunts Finn’s dreams in a way that he doesn’t quite recognize at first. Stormtroopers were strongly discouraged from forming any sort of attachment, and they weren’t given any opportunities for sexual experimentation, so it’s not a huge surprise that Finn doesn’t recognize sexual attraction for what it is.

What is surprising is that he feels it for Rey just as strongly as he feels it for Ren.

Rey elected to camp out in one of the stone huts during the first few days they were on Ahch-To, a constant reminder to Luke that they were there for a reason. Finn, meanwhile, sleeps in one of the crew cabins on the _Falcon_. He suggested that Rey sleep there as well once Skywalker had agreed to teach them, but she told him she’d slept in worse circumstances and liked having the space.

In retrospect, this is a relief for Finn; he isn’t sure how difficult it would be to face Rey immediately after waking up from a dream where she’s beneath him, legs wrapped around his hips as he thrusts into her while she screams his name. Easier to hastily pick up where the dream left off with his hand wrapped around his cock, then take a quick wash in the fresher while he forces himself to focus on reality instead of fantasy.

Finn doesn’t know if it’s possible to pick up on sexual tension in the Force, and there’s no good way to ask Skywalker without giving any indication as to why he’s asking. He also doesn’t know if the attraction is reciprocated at all. He wouldn’t know how to read the signs, and he doubts that Rey’s lifestyle on Jakku involved much in the way of sex or relationships of any sort.

He knows she wonders about Ren’s whereabouts just as Finn does, even though they haven’t discussed it since the first time she brought it up. The thing is, Finn can’t figure out why Ren seemed to take it so personally that Finn had defected. Something had passed between them that night in Tuanul—he’s never going to forget the sheer terror of knowing Kylo Ren had seen him blatantly disobeying a direct order to kill—but he doesn’t dare bring it up with anyone, even Rey.

Skywalker trains them for three months, then tells them to get the kriff off of his island. “I’m too old for this fight,” he says.

Rey fights him on it. “You’re the exact same age as General Organa, and she’s not too old for it.”

The Jedi Master sighs. “Leia always did have more spirit than I,” he says quietly. Something about his tone makes Finn suspect that the words aren’t meant for his and Rey’s ears. “This is your fight now,” he continues, speaking in a normal tone of voice again. “You two are powerful in the Force. More powerful than you know. You came to me with training that I couldn’t even begin to attempt; all that I am able to teach you, I’ve already taught.”

Finn, who has yet to fully break the habit of obeying orders from a superior, is faster to accept this than Rey is. “He’s right and you know it,” he tells her later on, aften Skywalker has retreated to his hut. “We both already have a set of skills and training that are more useful in battle than meditation and lifting rocks.”

Rey bites her lip, a motion that catches Finn’s eye and reminds him of last night’s dream. He feels his face warm and looks down at the ground, attempting to put some of that Jedi restraint into action. He’s almost managed to shove all wayward thoughts down when she asks, “But what about Ren?”

Kriff. “What about him?” he asks, praying Rey doesn’t ask why he’s so nervous all of a sudden.

“Do you think we’re ready to fight him?” she asks. “And the others. You said there were others, didn’t you? The Knights of Ren?”

Finn nods. “They would travel with him sometimes,” he explains. “I think they’re Force-sensitive, otherwise he wouldn’t allow them to join. But I don't know anything else about them. Everything about Kylo Ren was always a mystery, probably because it was scarier to think of him as a monster.”

Except that—no, that’s not quite right. It’s scarier to realize Ren is just as human as he and Rey are.

“You managed to take Ren down with a weapon you’d never held before,” he reminds Rey. “Now that we’ve been training and have weapons of our own, I think we can take them on.” He holds up the hilt to the lightsaber he made himself using kyber crystals that had been stored in the temple on Ahch-To.

Rey smiles at him. It was difficult to elicit smiles from her for a while, but he’s seen that expression more and more. It makes him feel warm in a completely different manner than his illicit fantasies about her do. “You’re right,” she replies, pulling out her own weapon, a dual-blade saberstaff. It suits her, something Finn didn’t hesitate to tell her the first time he saw her light it up. “Now come on. We have an evil regime to take down, and a Knight along with it.”

* * *

The utter humiliation Kylo feels at having been bested by an untrained scavenger and a traitor to the First Order practically chokes him as he flies to the _Supremacy_ , where his master will no doubt punish him for his failure to kill—or turn—the scavenger.

(Of course, there’s another, heavier emotion he’s feeling at his actions prior to Starkiller’s destruction, but the humiliation is easier to stomach. Barely.)

Supreme Leader Snoke’s comments about Kylo’s failure dig into him, hitting him in weak spots he didn’t know he still had. A child in a mask, his master calls him, derision dripping from every syllable.

Kylo destroys the mask in a fit of pent-up aggravation and makes no move to replace it. _Let the past die,_ he tells himself. He doesn’t need to hide himself away in order to inflict fear on anyone who would get in his way.

The Resistance managed to flee their base on D’Qar before the First Order could get there, but Snoke isn’t too worried about it. “The Republic is dead,” he says to Kylo and Hux. “We must focus on filling that power void in the galaxy. The Resistance won’t be able to fight us when we’ve got that strength on our side.”

Hux’s disdain for Kylo is stronger than ever, but it’s nothing compared to the loathing Kylo feels for himself.

It’s weakness that brought him down. Weakness for the regret at what he did to his father. Weakness for the way he can’t stop thinking about the look on the scavenger’s face as she called him a monster. Weakness for the time spent wondering how the traitor could simply walk away from it all.

And weakness that leads him to the moment where he’s in the shower, hand furiously stroking his cock when he thinks about what they would look like with his cock down their throats.

For kriff’s sake, he doesn’t have time for this. Attachment—sexual or otherwise—has never been something Kylo has allowed himself to have, not when he still has so much more work to do before he can take up his mantle as the true heir to Lord Vader. It’s shameful that he finds himself so distracted by the thought of the ways he could make either of them scream with pleasure instead of pain that he allows Trudgen Ren to get a good hit when they’re sparring a few weeks after the destruction of Starkiller Base.

(It’s nothing compared to the hit the scavenger got on him—something that is still etched across his face—but it’s enough to make him realize he needs to rid himself of these thoughts.)

Without the piece of the map to Skywalker, he’s stuck, infuriated by the knowledge that the traitor and the scavenger have no doubt dragged his uncle out from whatever rock he’s hiding on so that they can train to be good little Jedi. They’ll have to come out eventually, however; unlike Skywalker, they can’t hide forever.

And when they do, Kylo will be ready. He runs into battle, hungry to see their faces so that he can take them down and finally rid himself of the weakness they both draw out of him, and leaves disappointed even as he emerges triumphant. He hates them for the way he can’t stop thinking about them, and yet there’s no one he hates more than himself.

He finally gets his chance six months after the battle on Starkiller Base, when he finds himself locked in a duel with the scavenger.


	2. II

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> space magic means everyone has a medical implant that is 100% effective against pregnancy and STIs, so there's a brief mention of that here

Rey shouldn’t be so surprised that Kylo Ren has managed to follow her to Felucia. Her only regret is that Finn isn’t by her side as she lunges at Ren, her brand new saberstaff lit up with bright yellow blades.

Curiously, he has ditched the helmet. It should make him a less intimidating opponent; instead, Rey is finding it increasingly difficult to forget that he’s her enemy. It doesn’t help that she’s woken up aching in a way that her fingers never seem to quite relieve from dreams of having this man in all manner of depraved ways, her imagination filling in the gaps using scenes from illicit holos she’d scavenged back on Jakku.

It’s that same ache now, a throb that begins between her legs and pulses through her core as she lunges at him, trying her hardest to get a hit at him, but he blocks them all as if she’s nothing more than a nuisance.

It makes her see red.

“I see you managed to find Skywalker,” he sneers as he blocks another swipe of her blade. “Obviously you learned something, but you haven’t unlocked your true potential.”

“What would you know of potential?” she hisses, striking at his left side, which he also blocks. Twat. “You threw yours away when you went to the dark side.”

“You’re wrong,” he says. “I have achieved things that the light side never could have given me. I could give the same to you, if you wanted.”

It’s only when her back hits something solid that Rey realizes he has her cornered up against a tree. His face is expressive, but she’s not certain how to interpret the microexpressions flitting across it. He’s enjoying having her pinned like this, that much is clear from the way he leans in despite the blades locked in place between their bodies. There’s a scar running across his face that wasn’t there the first time they met. Rey jolts as she realizes it’s from her wound, something dark and possessive trickling up her spine at the way she’s marked him.

“Why are you so set on turning me to the dark side?” she asks, attempting to wiggle out of the position without injuring herself with her own weapon. Strong she may be, but Ren has height and bulk on his side, and he’s not afraid to use them to his advantage. “There is nothing you have that will tempt me.”

“I told you,” he says through gritted teeth, “you have—”

“Don’t say ‘potential,’” she snaps. “What is it you really want from me, Ren?” This is starting to feel a little too personal, something that he evidently agrees with, judging from the way his Force signature shutters.

“You can feel our potential, can’t you?” With how close they are, he doesn’t need to yell, even over the sound of their blades screeching as they grind against each other. “We could be powerful together, you and I.”

“I’m powerful on my own,” she retorts, wondering if she should mention Finn, if mention of _the traitor_ would make Ren’s mood better or worse. Worse, probably. And anyway, it’s difficult to think about Finn when Ren is so close. She could reach out and touch him, finding out if he’s as muscular as her fantasies say he is. They’re both sweating in the humid climate of the jungle and she barely has the self-preservation to not allow her focus to drift to the way she wants to lick his neck to know how he tastes.

It’s just—he’s so _big_ , and Rey is not used to seeing human men who are this big. She’s not exactly small, but there’s something about the way he towers over her that nearly makes her lose her mind with desire.

Whether he falters because he can tell where her thoughts are going, or if it’s because he thinks she’s willing to listen to him argue his way into training her, it’s unclear. There’s a minute shift in his stance, and then next thing Rey knows, she’s lunging for Ren not to kill him, but to kiss him.

* * *

Out of all of the actions Kylo predicted from the scavenger, a kiss is nowhere near that list.

He shouldn’t be surprised that his reaction is to drop his weapon completely so that he can fist one hand in her hair, disheveling the three-bun style she prefers, but he has apparently lost all semblance of self-control around this woman because he’s returning the kiss greedily.

Kylo hasn’t had much practice with this, and he doubts the scavenger has, either. The kiss is a mess of tongues and teeth—he full-on shivers when she bites his lip—but he expected no less from her. He’s fantasized about having her all manner of ways, but he never gave much thought as to the setting. The middle of a forest is as good a place as any, he supposes, although the _for what_ still hangs in the air.

She bites his lip again, harder this time. Judging from the coppery taste in his mouth, she’s drawn blood. It should not turn him on as much as it does that she’s so violent in this act.

Tit for tat. He bites her back, tugging her bottom lip between his teeth. She hisses, then reaches around his back and tugs his hair hard enough to tilt his head back, giving her access to the sensitive skin of his neck. There’s not much she can do, given how he’s covered nearly head to toe in clothing and armor, but she manages to bite the spot under his ear, barely taking the time to soothe it with her tongue before tugging the collar of his jacket. He debates the wisdom of disrobing for approximately half a second before he scrambles to unfasten the belt holding it together.

The scavenger wastes no time, shoving the thick fabric off of his shoulders and to the forest floor, leaving him in the black long-sleeved tunic he was wearing under it. He thinks he hears her mutter, “That’s better,” but then she goes for his neck again and _kriff_ this is either the best idea he’s ever had or the worst, because she is undoubtedly leaving a mark that he’s going to have a hard time hiding.

He was already half-hard simply from the rush of having her alone, away from the rest of the fight; now, he wouldn’t be able to hide his arousal even if he tried. The scavenger, greedy as she is, is rubbing against him, looking for the same kind of relief he is.

She bites him again—his collarbone this time—which spurs him into action. Who is she, that she thinks she can get away with doing this to the master of the Knights of Ren? He grabs one of her buns and tugs hard enough to force her to look up at him. She’s smirking, the challenge clear when she says, “I thought you could take whatever you wanted?”

Oh, _hell_ no. He kisses her, not bothering to hold up any pretense of gentleness (as if he was doing that before, obviously). He keeps one hand fisted in her hair, holding her head in place while he kisses her; the other he uses to palm at one of her breasts, praying he’s doing this right. In his fantasies, she’s always squirming at his touch, begging for his cock anywhere he wants it.

In reality, she’s unimpressed, something she makes abundantly clear in the Force and in the way she grabs his hand and rips off his glove before shoving it under her shirt and _oh kriff she’s not wearing anything under this, is she?_

She’s hot and sweaty from the fight, something he doesn’t mind in the least. He trails his lips down her neck, leaving at least as many marks on her as she’s left on him, then bends down to give the same treatment to her breasts. She hisses when he flicks his tongue over her nipple, tightening her grip in his hair. He does it again, then moves to the other, using his free hand to tweak her nipple. “Better,” she gasps.

In response, he bites her nipple, then straightens up and turns her around so that her back is to him. “‘Better’?” he growls in her ear. “That’s all you’ve got?”

“You don’t know what you’re doing, do you?” she says. The skepticism in her tone is embarrassing; why he finds that arousing, he’s afraid to discover.

“Shut the fuck up,” he replies, pinning her to the tree, leaving just enough space for him to palm her breast, pinching her nipple hard enough to make her yelp.

She arches her back, grinding her ass against his erection, and he has a sudden realization that he could come undone just from this. Rey must sense this, because she laughs and speeds up her thrusts. “How does it feel to know that a simple scavenger from Jakku can beat you in combat _and_ make you come fully-clothed?”

His face is on fire. “You think you’re so tough,” he growls. She shivers all over, a reaction that is only partially satisfying. He wraps one arm around her hips, pinning her in place, and shoves his other hand down the front of her leggings.

Kriff, she’s so wet. Kylo knows enough about anatomy to understand what that means, but he’s still shocked by it. “You dirty little Jedi,” he whispers in her ear. “You want this just as badly as I do.” Having no practical experience in this, he isn’t entirely certain of the best way to touch her, but his fingers brush over a spot that makes her keen and he knows he’s done something right. He does it again, fingers moving in a haphazard pattern as he pays attention to her reactions.

To his disappointment—and humiliation—he can’t replicate it, something that Rey makes very clear when she growls and sticks her hand down to rest on top of his, directing his fingers to move the way she wants. “You’re the one who needs a teacher,” she hisses.

In response, he presses down harder, needing to prove that he’s capable of making her come without her help. He’s rewarded only a few minutes later when she lets out a loud moan, her entire body shuddering as she comes.

Embarrassingly, it’s nearly enough to make him come; her pleasure is echoed so strongly in the Force.

He doesn’t want to stop touching her, wants to make her come again, but she rips his hand out of her pants and shoves him backwards. “We’re not done here,” she warns. The idea of fucking Rey while he has her pressed up against a tree—well, it’s certainly not how he imagined it going, but he’ll take what he can get.

* * *

Out of all the scenarios, getting off while Kylo kriffing Ren clumsily fingers her in a forest is not how Rey thought her day would go. She’s surprised to realize how clueless this man is. Given all of his posturing about training her and being the master of the Knights of Ren, she expected a lot more from him.

As far as orgasms go, however...not bad at all, even if she’s not fully satisfied yet.

There’s barely enough room for her to turn around, considering he’s still holding her to him, but she’s not exactly gentle as she pushes him backwards, causing him to stumble. “On the ground,” she commands. “If we’re going to fuck, we’re doing it my way.”

There’s a brief glint of contempt in his eyes, but he gets down on the ground, knees bent while he rests on his elbows, making eye contact with her the entire time. The size of the bulge in his trousers makes her feel light-headed; she’s never had anything bigger than her fingers inside of her. But if she leaves now, there’s no telling what the consequences will be for leaving them both unsatisfied. Ren is definitely the type to hold a grudge, as his past actions have shown.

“This is going to be difficult if you don’t take your dick out,” she says wryly.

He hesitates; the reason for it becomes clear when he asks, “Are you, uh. Do you have an implant?”

She tugs one of her arm wraps down far enough to show him the little bump on her bicep where the standard medical implant required of all Resistance personnel rests. “You?” she asks.

He nods, then unfastens his trousers.

Rey is less prepared for the sight of his cock than she had assumed she would be. She’s seen all matter of genitalia, human and non-human, in dirty holofilms, but there’s something different about seeing something and knowing you’re about to have it inside of you, she supposes. When she doesn’t immediately move, Ren swallows. “You’ve seen mine. Now show me yours.”

She rolls her eyes. She’s never met a more entitled being in all her nineteen years of existence. “We’re in the middle of the woods, and a battle is raging not too far away,” she reminds him. “We’re removing as little clothing as possible.”

Is it her imagination, or does he look disappointed by this? Whatever; he knows they don’t have much time just as well as she does. “Have you ever done this before?” he asks, watching her unfasten her trousers and tug them down to just above her knees.

“Do you care?” she retorts, shuffling until she’s positioned herself over his hips, facing away from him. It’s awkward, but there aren’t a lot of options if she’s going to get him inside of her—and oh, does she want him inside of her. “Do you want to do this or not?” she asks, needing to hear him say yes.

“Let me see your face,” he says, gripping her hips as she sits on his stomach, rolling her hips so that his cock is sliding along her folds. “I want to know what you look like when you come on my cock.”

She smirks, even though he can’t see it. “I don’t think you’ve earned that yet.”

“That implies you’re willing to give me a chance to do so,” he points out.

That is not at all what she meant. “This is never happening again,” she tells him. “What is it, Ren? Yes or no?”

“You really need to ask?” The question ends in a groan as his hips buck up, trying to chase the friction she’s offering. It occurs to her that they could both probably get off like this. It also occurs to her that this is something she will probably work into her rotation of sexual fantasies...except that she’s going to do this once and get Kylo Ren out of her system forever.

“I like explicit consent,” she replies. “And I want to hear you say it.”

“You’re making me lose my mind,” he says, tightening his grip on her hips to a degree that’s a little painful. When contrasted to the sensation between her legs, however, it serves to heighten the pleasure. “Just let me fuck you so that I can stop thinking about you.”

There’s an implication in that statement that she’s not going to think about right now. Or ever. Rather than reply with words, she lifts her hips up enough to notch his cock at her entrance. It takes a couple of tries, something that has Ren gasping, but then she finally gets him in the right spot and slowly sinks down onto him.

He is considerably larger than her fingers. It’s a good thing she’s so slick from her previous orgasm, otherwise this would be painful for her. As it is, there’s a burn as her body adjusts to the breadth of him, but the pleasure she gets at being full of him is like nothing she’s ever experienced before. “Oh,” she gasps once she’s taken him to the root.

In response, he lets out a garbled noise that she takes to mean “Please keep going.”

Her movements are clumsy at first, with both the position and the motion being unfamiliar, but Rey has always been a quick learner, and she soon finds a rhythm that has her gasping with pleasure.

“Fuck,” Ren says, attempting to sit up for more leverage.

The idea of him holding her while she’s bouncing on his cock is too intimate for comfort. Besides, hasn’t he proven that this works best if he follows her instructions? “Sit back,” she says, using the Force to push him back down to the ground. It’s just enough to remind him that she’s just as strong as he is, if not more so. If he really wanted to fight her, he could.

And yet he obeys without question, letting her do what she wants with him. “By the Force, this is better than I imagined,” she hears him say. Knowing that he’s thought about this, too, makes her even wetter, as wrong as it is for them to want each other like this.

She’s so wound up, a coil tightening in her gut. Ren is right there with her, the Force exposing how good this feels for him, too. “I’m—oh fuck, I’m close,” he gasps after only a couple of minutes.

“You’re not allowed to come before I do,” she warns him.

“Well, then you’d better hurry up,” he says, sounding as winded as if he’d just run from one end of a Star Destroyer to the other.

Knowing how close he is to losing it over her—her, a measly scavenger from Jakku!—brings her closer to the edge. The thing that pushes her over it is the way she reaches between her legs, rubbing tight circles around her clit. It barely takes two of them to break her, causing her to cry out as she clenches around his cock.

Ren must have barely been holding on, because he lets out a strangled groan as he comes. It’s unnerving to realize she can feel him pulsing inside of her, filling her with his cum. It makes her feel filthy as she stands up, trying to hide how wobbly her legs are as she pulls her trousers back up and fastens her belt. She needs another minute to regain her composure before she can look at him again.

He looks as wrecked as Rey feels, still breathing hard as he fastens his belt. She can tell he’s struggling to keep his expression neutral so as to avoid giving anything away, but there’s something in it that causes a tendril of doubt to curl in her belly. “This never happened,” she says, looking away from him as she calls her weapon back into her hand.

“Of course it didn’t,” he snaps, reaching for his own lightsaber.

“And it will never happen again.”

“Obviously.”

Rey had thought that finally fucking Ren down into the dirt would make the tension between them snap. Instead, it stretches even tighter than it had before. “Well, then,” she says, trying to figure out what to do next. She’s not going to capture him. At least not today. There’s no way she can stomach the mortification of going back to the Resistance with Ren as her prisoner with his cum dripping down her legs, and it’s clear from his aura in the Force that he’s in no mood to take her prisoner again, either.

“I’m going to go back and report to my superiors that I didn’t see anything or anyone out here,” she tells him. “I trust you’ll do the same.”

“As if I’m going to tell anyone I fucked _you_ ,” he sneers. Despite the fact that she’s never going to admit this happened, either, it still hurts to hear him act like she’s beneath him. Especially since she just had _him_ beneath _her_.

“It never happened, remember?” she shoots back.

There’s another pause where they’re both looking at each other, daring each other to make the next move. Rey is the one who breaks first, turning around and sprinting away like she can outrun the shame of what just happened here.

When she returns to the base, she can’t even look Finn in the eye as she gives her report about today’s mission.

* * *

The fact that his master doesn’t question his story that he was unable to find and capture either of the Force-sensitives that have eluded him is suspicious, but Kylo is too wrung-out to care. He has no idea what came over him, allowing the scavenger to treat him like that.

And yet, he can’t deny how damned _hot_ it was to let her use him like that, knowing it was his cock she was clenching around as she came. The memory of it is enough to make him hard again when he’s in the fresher later on, and he’s too weak to resist the urge to relive it as he fucks his hand, wondering how she looked when she came.

_Never again,_ he tells himself as he washes his cum off of the fresher walls. _I will be stronger next time._


	3. III

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i added "tfw you deepthroat your enemy out of spite" as a tag because of this chapter and i think that pretty much sums it up. it's finnlo trash. enjoy.

Rey has been acting strange ever since she got back from a mission that turned out to be a bust. She’s lying about something, but Finn doubts anyone notices except him. It hurts to think that she’d keep something from him, but he reminds himself that everyone is entitled to their secrets. Rey is no different simply because she’s his closest friend.

Still, he can’t help but bring it up two weeks later. “Something’s up,” he says as they’re cooling down after sparring. “What happened on that mission?”

She flushes. “Nothing happened,” she says. “It was a bust. You’ve seen my report.”

Her aura in the Force suggests she’s offended that he doesn’t trust her, something he’s quick to deny. “Of course I trust you,” he says, picking up the conversation as if she’d actually said that aloud. It’s something that’s been happening more and more as they’ve grown closer. “I’m just worried, that’s all.”

The smile she gives him is small but tender. “I’d tell you if I was in trouble,” she says softly. “I promise.”

He’s still thinking about that smile two days later, when he’s on a reconnaissance mission on Dantooine. Later, Finn will blame that smile for the distraction that leads him right into Kylo Ren’s clutches. Intel says that the Knights of Ren have been spotted near here, so he and Rey have split up, each of them covering one set of abandoned ruins.

This time around, when Ren screams “Traitor!” at him, it sounds marginally less unhinged. Finn supposes that’s to be expected; Ren’s wounds from the fight on Starkiller have healed. There’s a scar across his face that must be Rey’s doing. Finn feels a small swell of pride on her behalf and can’t wait to inform her about it when he gets back to base.

“There’s no shame in betraying an organization aiming to sow chaos and terror in the galaxy,” he replies, ready to meet Ren’s next hit.

Ren’s a better fighter now that he’s no longer injured, but so is Finn, and he’s relieved to know that he can still hold his own in a fight against someone who has years of lightsaber training on him. “You’re a coward,” Ren seethes. “You’re on the wrong side of this war.”

Finn’s too focused on defending Ren’s next few hits as he advances on him, the fury evident in every single movement. “Funny,” Finn says. “From where I’m standing, you’re on the wrong side, Ren.”

It’s strange how personal this feels. There wasn’t a single soldier in the stormtrooper corps who didn’t know who Kylo Ren was, but he’d never given any indication that he even noticed the troopers running around. The fact that they were always required to wear their armor heightened the anonymity, which makes it all the more surprising that Ren can apparently pick him out of a line.

Is it simply because of the Force? Finn has been exposed to so few Force-sensitive individuals that it’s impossible to know from experience, and none of them are strangers.

If he tries, he can sense Ren in the Force, a stormcloud of emotional instability charging in Finn’s direction. “Traitor,” Ren growls again.

Finn narrowly misses Ren’s next stab; the way he dodges it puts him right along the knight’s side. He’s close enough to say, “I have a name, and it’s not ‘traitor,’” before shoving Ren to the side.

What Finn didn’t consider about this move was the fact that Ren could pull Finn down with him, knocking him over and pinning Finn underneath him.

“Fine, _FN-2187_ ,” Ren says. Aside from keeping Finn pinned to the ground, he’s not hurting him. There’s a strange tension in the air that can’t possibly be sexual tension, can it?

“Finn,” he breathes. “My name is Finn.” Ren looks baffled, something that causes Finn to add, “What, you think you’re the only one who has another name outside of the First Order?”

He’s expecting Ren to be absolutely livid; what he gets is an even stronger tangle of emotions, right before Ren kisses him.

_What the fuck_ is Finn’s first thought. _Why am I not stopping this_ is his second. Ren’s motions are sloppy and violent, something that shouldn’t be such a surprise. And anyway, it’s not as if Finn would know the difference between a good kiss and a bad one.

This is...well, it’s something, that’s for sure. And it’s definitely not bad. At some point they both dropped their weapons, because Finn’s hands are free to tangle in Ren’s annoyingly soft hair while Ren none-too-gently forces Finn’s lips open, sweeping his tongue through Finn’s mouth.

It’s so, so wrong to be kissing Kylo Ren in the middle of a battle. _But you’re all alone,_ a little voice whispers to him. _You’ve been thinking about this, haven’t you?_

Evidently, Ren has, too, if Finn is reading his Force aura correctly. _Finally,_ it’s saying. And is that— _oh kriff that’s an erection and it’s not mine_ runs through his mind as Kylo thrusts against him.

Not that Finn is in a different state at the moment; it’s _hot_ to know how bad Ren wants him. Something of that thought must be apparent in the Force, because Ren pulls back, stands up, and says, “This doesn’t mean anything.”

Finn scoffs, pushing himself up off the ground as well. “Obviously.”

Ren is still standing so close. Despite the way he seethes, “I hate you,” he’s not acting like he wants to resume their duel.

Finn isn’t all that interested in dueling right now, either. “Shut the fuck up, Ren.” This time, he’s the one who leans in, tugging on Ren’s hair to hold him in place while he kisses him, pulling him back so that they’re leaning up against a stone wall from the ruins they’re standing in. There’s a delicious groan Ren lets out when Finn bites his bottom lip; he’ll have to remember that.

Well, he’ll have to remember that for _today_. This is never happening again.

* * *

Kylo can’t exactly put his finger on why he kissed the traitor. He wants to blame the scavenger, whom, despite his best efforts, he has not been able to forget. She doesn’t care enough about Kylo to be annoyed that he’s kissing someone else, but she surely cares enough about the traitor that there’s a sort of revenge to be had in knowing that Kylo had kissed him.

Except that’s not completely true, because Kylo had already been thinking about this, even before he and the scavenger...well, that never happened, so it doesn’t matter right now. And anyway, it’s difficult to think about anything other than the way the traitor is pulling Kylo’s hair so hard it almost hurts as he tugs Kylo’s head back so that he can get to his neck.

Kriff, he’d almost managed to forget how sensitive his skin was. The marks the scavenger had left were easy enough to hide until they faded, thanks to his general uniform of high-necked jackets; he’d smirked to himself later on thinking about how she was going to have to explain her injuries. Considering what the traitor is currently doing, he's going to be in for another round of “hide the hickeys with a cowl.” He can’t say he’s truly sorry about it, at least not this moment, when he gasps at the little pinprick of pain that’s quickly soothed by the traitor’s tongue.

The traitor—Finn, _what a stupid name_ ; he’s still a traitor and Kylo refuses to call him anything else—is amused by this. “Is that what all that was about, when you were beating your own wound on Starkiller Base?” he asks. “You have a pain kink?”

“I do _not_ have a— _oh_.” He doesn’t have a pain kink, what the hell does that even mean? But the traitor is leaving another mark, lower on Kylo’s neck. He’s biting harder this time, and it feels even better than before. “Like you’re not enjoying this,” he snaps, thrusting his hips against the traitor’s. Kriff, this should not feel as good as it does.

The traitor pauses. Kylo can sense that he’s got an idea, but he doesn’t give any indication of what he’s thinking until he lets go of his hold on Kylo’s hair in favor of tugging his belt, making it clear that he intends to do _something_ to Kylo. Something that’s going to feel really, really good, judging from the way he’s stroking Kylo’s cock over his trousers.

Something of his pleasure must be evident in the Force, because the traitor smirks and says, “You’ve thought about this, haven’t you.”

He doesn’t bother to deny it. “Fuck you,” he says instead. It ends in a groan when the traitor unfastens his trousers and pulls Kylo’s cock out, the shit-eating grin on his face growing when he realizes that Kylo is so hard he’s practically dripping precum.

The traitor bites his neck again, stroking him at a pace that’s closer to a tease than relief. “More,” Kylo groans, thrusting into his hand.

It seems that the traitor isn’t going to let Kylo off that easy, because he pulls his hand away and says, “I shouldn’t be surprised that you’re so demanding during sex.”

Kylo scoffs, although it’s a bit strangled. “You call this sex?”

There’s a pause where they stare at each other, daring the other to make a move. The traitor is the one who moves first, dropping to his knees in front of Kylo and licking a long, hot stripe up the length of his cock before taking the tip in his mouth and sucking, _hard_.

* * *

Finn hesitates, a question forming that he should have asked before he’d gotten on his knees. “You have an implant, right?” he asks.

“Of course I do,” Ren snaps. “You know it’s standard in the First Order.”

“Not among stormtroopers,” Finn mutters. “We were strongly discouraged from this sort of thing.” He’s surprised that Ren doesn’t already know this, given that he’s in high enough command that he probably sets these rules himself.

“Great,” Ren spits out, radiating sexual frustration in a single syllable.

If Finn weren’t so turned on by this, he’d laugh at how easy it is to reduce this monster of a man into a ball of desperation. As it is, he’s quick to get on with it, needing to see how much more he can make Ren unravel.

The strangled groan Ren lets out when Finn takes him into his mouth is delicious. Has anyone done this to him before, or is Finn the first? There’s something possessive about that that he’s not sure he’s entirely comfortable with, especially considering how it makes something hot surge low in his belly.

“Fuck,” Ren says as Finn takes him deeper. At the first sign that he’s going to start thrusting his hips, Finn pins him in place using the Force. Ren curses him when he realizes what he’s doing. “You asshole.”

If his mouth wasn’t so busy, he’d smirk at Ren's frustration. Despite what he’s saying, it’s evident in the Force that he likes being pinned in place, letting Finn do what he wants. This could easily be an act that ends with Ren shoving his cock down Finn’s throat, but it’s clear that Finn has the power here as he widens his jaw and takes Ren even deeper.

Ren’s pent-up sexual tension must be even greater than Finn’s, because it’s not even half a second later that he lets out a groan loud enough to draw attention to anyone within earshot and comes down Finn’s throat. It’s far from the most pleasant thing he’s tasted, but he swallows it down anyway out of pride, releasing Ren's cock with a pop and relinquishing his Force hold. Ren’s looking at him with an expression that’s a combination of shame, anger, and disbelief. It’s heady, and Finn has the uncomfortable suspicion that it’s not something he’s going to forget easily.

“Wow,” Finn says. “Seriously? That’s it?”

Ren is furious, but under the anger is a thread of arousal. Huh. So Kylo Ren gets off on being torn down.

Interesting.

“What, you think you can do better?” Ren sneers as he tucks his spent cock into his trousers.

Finn smirks as he stands up, brushing dirt off his knees. “Are you offering?”

“So what if I am?” Now that he’s caught his breath, the growl is back. It’s kind of hot, now that Finn’s thinking about it.

Or maybe that’s just the erection that’s diverting all blood from his brain.

“Do it,” Finn says, the challenge evident in his tone.

There’s a moment where he thinks Ren might actually pick up his lightsaber and resume their duel, but then he sinks to his knees, clumsily pawing at the fastening of Finn’s trousers. He’s still wearing gloves, so Finn grabs his hands and tugs those off before unfastening his trousers.

Despite his attempts to act uninterested, Ren’s quick to get his hands on Finn’s cock, eyes darting between Finn’s face and cock as he strokes it slowly. He seems to be at a loss for what to do next, making Finn wonder if this is really such a good idea, after all.

No, it’s a terrible idea. But he’s got Kylo Ren on his knees and damn, if this isn’t a sight to behold.

“Well?” Finn says, annoyed at how breathy his voice sounds. Ren’s not doing much—certainly not enough to get Finn off—but it still feels unbelievably good having his hand wrapped around Finn’s cock.

In response, Ren imitates what Finn just did to him when he takes the tip of Finn’s cock in his mouth and sucks. “Fuck,” Finn hisses, unable to stop his hips from jerking forward, forcing himself deeper in to Ren’s mouth. Curiously, Ren doesn’t bother with a Force hold of any sort. It’s unclear if he’s trying to prove a point, but Finn can’t deny that it feels good.

It looks good, too. Ren’s mouth is stretched over Finn’s cock, and he’s doing an impressive job taking it, Finn has to admit. Kriff, what gives this man the right to be so evil and so good-looking? It’s unfair, really.

Ren does his best to convey over the Force that he’s doing this out of spite, something that Finn is perfectly content with. He can dish it right back, after all. “Look at you,” he says as Ren takes him even deeper. “On your knees for a traitor.” There’s a split second where it occurs to him that taunting Ren while his teeth are within chomping distance of his dick is a bad idea, but Ren simply gives him a rude hand gesture and starts making slow movements, fucking Finn with his mouth.

Holy _fuck,_ this is hot. Finn’s never felt anything like it. He’d taunted Ren for having poor stamina, but he’s not going to last long like this, either. Ren has picked up on this, judging by the vicious look in his eyes, but Finn is nearly too far gone to care.

Nearly. He fists his hands in Ren’s hair, trying not to let himself get distracted by how soft it is. No, he’s doing this for leverage so that he can fuck Ren’s face, not because he wants to know if Ren’s hair feels as nice as it looks.

Ren inhales deeply, then takes Finn so deep, he hits the back of his throat. “Fuck,” he groans, struggling to hold on as he feels that familiar tingle up the base of his spine. “You don’t do things by halves, do you?”

His mouth may be too busy to respond, but Ren makes his smugness evident in the Force. Showoff.

Finn’s orgasm is iminent, as much as he wants to prove to Ren how much better his stamina is. Between the visual and the sensation, it’s just too much. Ren pulls back just enough so that he can take another breath; this time, when Finn’s cock hits the back of his throat, it’s enough to make him tip over the edge.

Ren, to his credit, swallows every last drop of Finn’s cum, although he still makes a show of wiping his mouth off on the edge of his jacket. Because of course he does.

* * *

This is twice now that Kylo has given in to his baser urges. His self-loathing is at an all-time high, but at least he satisfied his curiosity about the traitor.

Well, some of it, anyway. Of course, this is what he said about the scavenger, and he’s still jerking it to thoughts about her as well, which isn’t a good sign for how things are about to go down with her friend.

They rearrange their clothing in silence, neither of them acknowledging the other. He can still taste the traitor’s cum in the back of his throat, and he suspects it’s not something he’ll be able to forget easily. There’s something satisfying knowing that he’s fucked both of them and they’re undoubtedly keeping this a secret from each other. _Excellent,_ he thinks. If he can drive a wedge between them, they’ll be easier to take down the next time all three of them meet in battle.

Of course, there’s a not insignificant chance that he’s going to spontaneously combust if he ever meets both of them in battle at the same time again...but he’ll cross that bridge when he comes to it.

The traitor finally manages to catch Kylo’s eye as he’s pulling his gloves back on. “This—” he begins.

“Never happened,” Kylo snaps, calling his discarded weapon to his hand. “I know.”

The traitor nods. “Whatever this was, it never happened,” he agrees.

Kylo doesn’t know what the fuck it was, either. “Get the fuck out of here before I kill you,” he growls, but the words feel hollow.

There’s enough of a hesitation that he’s worried that the traitor is going to say something—worried that he _wants_ the traitor to say something—before he turns and runs, fleeing. Exactly like the scavenger had after she and Kylo...well, that never happened, and this didn’t, either.

Fuck.

Just, fuck.


	4. IV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this one's heavier on the angst and lighter on the smut. i promise the next one will be smuttier.
> 
> new tags: sexual fantasies, exhibitionism, voyeurism

Rey can’t tell if she’s projecting her guilt onto Finn when they meet up again after their search for stray Knights of Ren comes up empty. “Is everything okay?” she asks, taking in sight of his unusually frazzled Force signature. She puts a hand on his arm—that’s a thing that friends do for each other, right?—and says, “You didn’t find anything out there, did you?”

“Nope,” he says tensely. “Not a thing. You?”

She shakes her head. She’s disappointed, and not because they didn’t find any stray Knights. No, she’s disappointed because she couldn’t find their leader. She refuses to consider why she’s upset about that, choosing instead to focus on Finn. “Come on,” she says, letting her hand slide down his arm to grip his hand. “Let’s go back to base.”

The ride back is silent, each of them lost in their own thoughts. “Do you think it’s weird that we didn’t find anyone out there?” she asks once they’ve hit hyperspace.

He tenses for a brief moment before letting out a slow breath. “We knew they were a difficult group to pin down,” he says. “Maybe they knew we were coming and cleared out before we got there.”

“Maybe.” She’s not entirely convinced, but then again, none of them know what sort of tools the First Order has access to outside of what Finn has been able to tell them.

The mood continues once they’ve gotten back to the base on Ajan Kloss. It takes practically no time at all to debrief from the mission, and then they’re dismissed. “Kriff, I can’t wait for dinner,” she says. Food is rationed in the Resistance, but it’s nothing like the way she’d had to ration it back on Jakku. There’s no need to trade parts for barely enough food to get by, something that makes Rey cry when she thinks too hard about it. “Join me?”

Finn can’t meet her eyes when he says, “Actually, I’m pretty tired. I think I’m just going to rest. See you in the morning?”

Does he know that she was secretly hoping to run into Ren again? Is that why he’s being weird? “Okay,” she says, struggling to put that Jedi composure into practice. “Sure. Get some rest. I’ll see you later.”

Guilt, she learns that night, makes food taste bitter.

* * *

Supreme Leader Snoke can sense that something is amiss. “I thought you were worthy of my training,” he taunts Kylo mere hours after arriving back on the _Supremacy_ , still feeling sore from having the traitor’s cock down his throat. “The heir to Lord Vader. But look at you. Emerging from battle empty-handed.”

The words barely register with Kylo. He’s not surprised by Snoke’s words; he deserves every single syllable. But when Snoke delves into his mind, he puts power he didn’t know he had into protecting his memories about the traitor and the scavenger.

He’s not completely successful; that much is clear by the way Snoke sneers, “You’re still obsessed with that girl? She’s as good as dead if she’s with the Resistance. Besides,” he adds, his smile taking on a cruel glint. “It’s not as if you’d be able to teach her anything other than your own weakness.”

Kylo bites his own tongue in an effort to stop himself from blurting out something he can’t take back. “She would make a powerful ally,” he replies, knowing it will be much worse if he doesn’t say anything at all. “I still think she can be turned.”

Snoke pauses for long enough that Kylo begins to worry. “If you think she can be turned,” he finally says, “Bring her to me. You can’t be trusted to teach her the true power of the dark side.”

Kylo’s grateful that Snoke only knows he’s hung up on the scavenger and not the traitor as well. He bows his head. “As you wish, Master.”

The thing is, as much as Kylo wants to have her—have both of them—on his side, the idea of stealing the scavenger away and bringing her to Snoke like some sort of prize turns his stomach. He’s not going to delude himself into thinking that she’d throw away everything she has with the Resistance solely to have sex with him on the regular, as much as they’d both liked it before.

(And despite what was said afterwards, they both enjoyed it. Whether she didn’t hide that in the Force because she couldn’t or because she didn’t want to is unclear.)

Kriff, he should never have given in to either of them. Instead of sating his curiosity, his thirst has ratched up a hundred degrees. As weak as he is, he’s unable to resist the temptation to think about them late at night when his thoughts are keeping him awake. He’s half-tempted to reach out in the Force in an attempt to drop hints, but at least he’s strong enough to avoid that.

Three weeks after he saw the traitor, Kylo finds himself locked in a new, even more depraved fantasy:

What would they look like together?

He simultaneously wonders why this didn’t occur to him sooner and feels grateful it took him this long to consider, because this is an entirely new level of distracting. The mere concept of watching the scavenger and the traitor together has his blood rushing south, and he curses as he realizes this isn’t an erection he can meditate away.

Given that he couldn’t actually see much of the scavenger when they’d fucked, Kylo’s imagination has to fill in more details there. If she sucked the traitor’s cock, would she have done it as well as Kylo had? (He knows he’s not an expert, but he also knows that the traitor’s reaction hadn’t been faked. The Force doesn’t lie about something like that, Kylo has learned of late.) He’s thought plenty about what she’d look like choking on Kylo’s cock; the fantasy of watching her with someone else is… “Fuck,” he hisses, shoving the lightweight trousers he wears to sleep down to his knees.

There’s already a little precum, but Kylo’s not in a mood to be gentle with himself tonight, so he doesn’t bother adding any other lube. It’s just this side of uncomfortable, but it’s what he deserves for having thoughts like this.

_“Fuck,_ ” the traitor hisses in Kylo’s fantasy as the scavenger swallows him, one hand reaching down between her legs. “Oh, Rey.”

No, she’s _the scavenger,_ he reminds himself. And the other one isn’t Finn, he’s _the traitor._ Acknowledging their names feels oddly intimate; it’s much easier to give them titles instead.

Hi imagination doesn’t have to work very hard to fill in Rey— _the scavenger_ ’s response. He knows what she sounds like when she comes; it’s been playing on a loop when he’s alone late at night.

Kylo strokes himself faster as he falls deeper into his imagination. In the fantasy, they know he’s watching. They’re taunting him with the knowledge that he can look, but he can’t touch. They like putting on a show for him; knowing that they’re doing it for his benefit brings him closer to the edge. It’s less than a minute before Kylo comes with a groan he can’t completely silence, spilling onto his stomach in hot spurts.

If there’s a hell, he reflects later after he’s cleaned himself up, he’s already in it.

* * *

The next couple of weeks have Finn feeling so guilty about what happened with Ren that it’s like a physical weight. He seems to be able to hide it from everyone except Rey, who is, of course, the one person who can never, ever know about it because she would be so betrayed.

It’s also a problem because as their training has gone on, they’ve grown closer, which means that they’ve gained the ability to read each other in the Force.

(Not unlike the way Finn seems to be able to read Ren in the Force. Thinking about Ren and Rey in the same context only highlights how guilty Finn feels about everything.)

Finn and Rey meditate every morning in the training room that’s been designated “the Jedi space,” focusing on the Force and their place in it. It helps make him feel more settled, he thinks. But things are thrown off today when Rey comes rushing in nearly half an hour after they normally meet, bright red and giving off an aura in the Force that is more frazzled than he’s ever seen her. “I’m so sorry,” she says, dropping into a classic Jedi meditation stance with her legs crossed on the ground. “I, uh, overslept. Then lost track of time in the fresher.”

She’s lying. He’d know that even without the help of the Force. Why is she lying? And should he call her out on it? He looks at her, examining her flush and putting the dots together.

_Oh._ So that’s what she was doing in the shower. Shit, he can’t think about that now, the sight of Rey leaning against the fresher wall, fingers working between her legs as the water drips down her—

He clears his throat and rearranges his stance, willing the erection to subside before Rey picks up on it. “It’s fine,” he says, embarrassed by how rough his voice sounds. When he sneaks a peek at her expression, her eyes are squeezed shut, like she’s trying to force herself to calm down. “It happens sometimes.”

She nods, flushing harder. What does she look like when she comes? He’s seen her in all manner of facial expressions in the months he’s known her, everything from anger to frustration to elation to exhilaration. But what about pleasure? What about—

_Focus,_ he tells himself. And he does. For now. He can compartmentalize. But as soon as he’s alone, his hands are scrabbling for his belt buckle, and all his fantasies about watching Rey in the shower come flying back at him. Apparently, this is a new kink, because he lasts less than a minute before he’s spilling all over his hand. Ugh.

* * *

The next time Rey sees Ren after that is in a battle with Finn by her side. She can sense his arrival long before she sets eyes on him. Resistance intelligence said that they’d seen some of the Knights of Ren skulking around an old Imperial outpost, and they hadn’t been wrong.

They only see the other two knights at first, and Rey and Finn make quick work of them, knocking them out. She’s aware that Ren is somewhere nearby, and something sparks deep in her belly at the thought of seeing him again. Fucking him is hands-down the biggest mistake she’s made in her entire life, and yet she can’t stop thinking about the way he filled her up.

Kriff, she’s such a shitty excuse for a Jedi.

She and Finn have just disabled the other two knights when Ren makes an appearance. Upon seeing him, Rey is filled with a horrified mix of emotions that she’s afraid to examine too closely. She risks a glimpse at Finn, who she knows is equally horrified, thanks to the Force. It’s gotten easier for them to dip into each other’s feelings like that, but this is one scenario that he can never, ever know about.

Ren, on the other hand, looks enraged. Rey can sense him in the Force as well, something that isn’t nearly as welcome as Finn’s emotions are. Despite the way he screams at the other two other knights he has with him, he’s just as horrified to see Rey as she is to see him.

Wonderful. Everyone’s horrified. This is already going to shit.

She’s so distracted by the mess of emotions that she barely ducks in time to avoid a hit from one of the knights, and then everything is a mess of adrenaline and battle and Force and there’s no room for anything else. It’s a relief, to be honest. She doesn’t want to admit that she’d been hoping to get Ren alone so that they could have a repeat of what happened last time. If only she and Finn were...well, she’s not going to go down that route, not when there’s the risk of destroying her relationship with her closest friend.

Later, when she and Finn have gotten away and are on their way back to the Resistance, she can’t even describe what happened in the battle.

Finn, likewise, is wrapped in a post-battle haze as the adrenaline rush fades. “Are you okay?” Rey asks, trying to lessen her guilt by focusing on her friend.

He nods, but he’s paying far too much attention to the blaster he’s cleaning. “Of course,” he replies. “Are you?”

“Me?”

He sets the blaster down and looks at her. “You seemed…” He trails off. There are a million things he can say and Rey is not certain she wants to hear all of them. “Extra surprised, I suppose. We knew who we were looking for. What happened?”

Kriff, kriff, kriff. “I guess I wasn’t expecting to see Ren,” she says. It’s the truth, anyway. “I was only expecting to see the knights. It caught me off-guard.”

Finn nods, seeming mollified. “Yeah,” he says, looking back at the weapon. “Me too.”

Rey’s frustration with herself at how upset she is over not being able to get Ren alone carries on for days, enough so that even Finn has started taking notice. “Come on,” he says, standing up halfway through their usual morning meditation session a week later.

She pushes herself to her feet, grateful for the interruption. She doesn't like being alone with her feelings these days. “Why?”

“We’re going to spar,” Finn says. “Your agitation is so bad that I wouldn’t be surprised if droids were starting to feel it.” He’s trying to make it sound like a joke, but there’s real concern in his eyes.

“Are you sure that’s not you?” she says dryly. She hasn’t been so wrapped up in her own feelings that she can ignore Finn’s, not when they spend so much of their time together. He’s equally frustrated by that battle, although his reasons are no doubt not the same as hers.

He shrugs. “If it is, then I’m doing us both a favor.”

As soon as they shut the door to the training room behind them, Rey feels a part of herself unwind. She always feels safe here, whether she’s training alone or with Finn. Judging from the shift in his Force signature, he feels the same; it makes her feel warm inside.

“Shall we?” she says, grabbing her quarterstaff and walking toward the middle of the room.

Finn doesn’t have the same weapons training she does, but he’s picked up tips from Rey and applied them to his own training. He lets her take the lead on today’s weapon selection, grabbing a wooden practice sword to use against her. “Have at it,” he replies.

The way they move feels so much more graceful than it did months ago, when they were just barely touching the surface of their Jedi training. Within minutes, Rey feels her mood lighten as she loses herself in the rush of sparring with Finn.

At some point they drop their weapons and are fighting with hand-to-hand combat, which eventually turns into wrestling on the floor. They’ve always been evenly matched here, Rey’s scrappiness versus Finn’s formalized training turning into a good balance. But there’s an edge to it today that’s unfamiliar, like they’re teetering on the brink of something new.

Rey gets Finn half-pinned down on the floor, kneeling behind his head as her arms hold his shoulders down. “Yield,” she says, smiling down at him.

In response, he reaches up, grabs her head, and pulls her into what is likely the galaxy’s most awkward first kiss.

She returns it greedily, both of them shifting into a much less awkward position that somehow winds up with Rey sitting on Finn’s lap. Oh, this is _wonderful_ , and she is absolutely _not_ comparing it to someone else’s kiss. No, there is no comparison to be had here; kissing her best friend is far preferable to kissing her enemy. The shame is nonexistent, for one.

As tempting as it is to say _fuck it_ and do Finn right here, right now, on the dirty floor of their training room, she has enough of her wits about her to know that’s a bad idea. Finn is coming to that conclusion as well, evidently, because he drops his grip on her shoulders and pulls away suddenly. “Sorry,” he says as she scrambles off of his lap. “That was way out of line on my part.”

He feels guilty, she realizes. “It’s okay,” she says, struggling to balance her need to reassure him with her desire to see him naked. “I, uh.” She pauses, weighing her next words carefully. “I didn’t mind,” she admits. Finn instantly relaxes, which spurs her to continue. “I mean, you’re the closest friend I’ve ever had,” she babbles. “I’ve never felt as safe with anyone else as I do with you. But this is not—I mean, we’re in the middle of a war and it is not the time to be starting anything—”

“No yeah, of course,” he says. “I feel the same way about you. I’ve never met anyone like you, Rey.” She can’t stop herself from preening a little bit. “But you’re right, we should, um, focus. On training.”

“On training,” she repeats, smirking. “Sure.” She’s about to suggest they take it someplace more private when the guilt hits her like a speeder. _This is a terrible idea,_ it tells her. _He’d never forgive you if he knew what you did with Ren. What you still want to do with Ren._

Kriff. She can’t do this to Finn. He deserves so much better. “Actually,” she says, too deep in her own thoughts to register the way he’s shutting down as well, “I just remembered I promised Rose I’d help her with some repairs today.” She’s on her feet now, putting the weapon away so that she doesn’t have to see his expression. “I’ll see you later, Finn.”

* * *

_Well_ , Finn thinks as he watches Rey scurry out of the training room with an excuse he well knows she pulled out of her ass. _At least this means I don’t have to confess that I hooked up with Kylo Ren._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i don't have a detailed plan for this so forgive any worldbuilding logic or details that are glossed over. once again, this exists for the angsty smut and that's it.


	5. V

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I keep having to go back and add tags because my outline is essentially "Rey and Kylo fuck, then Finn and Kylo fuck, then Finn and Rey almost fuck but don't because guilt, then..." and I'm not planning any of the specific sex acts out. Today's new tags are come eating and public sex.

The next time Rey and Ren meet is considerably more awkward. She’s annoyed that her attraction to him hasn’t faded. If anything, it’s gotten stronger.

As has the guilt.

Finn’s kiss had her practically floating on air with happiness, which has helped push the guilt and confusion away. Rey has always been a pro at compartmentalizing, and her attraction to her enemy and to her best friend is no different. But it’s impossible to think about Finn when she and Ren lock eyes across a crowded market on Batuu.

They’re both wearing disguises, of course, so it’s not obvious that they’ve locked eyes, but it’s clear as day to two people who are so attuned to each other in the Force. The fact that she’s more aware of his Force signature than she used to be must be a product of her training, because she refuses to consider any other alternatives. Where it was a vague impression before, it’s a much clearer picture now.

Shit.

Fortunately, Ren has the sense to not start a lightsaber duel in the middle of a crowded market where Rey is on a top-secret reconnaissance mission. Unfortunately, any reason he’s here and not sequestered away on whatever First Order ship he’s calling home these days can’t possibly be a good one. To her surprise, Ren is the one who turns and walks out of the market, away from her. She follows because how can she not? She has to know why he’s here.

And it’s _not_ a slight sting of hurt she feels at the knowledge that he doesn’t care about hunting her down right now. Absolutely not.

He makes his way through a maze of streets. He must know she’s following him—if she can sense him so clearly in the Force, there’s no way he can’t do the same with her—but he makes no move to acknowledge her presence. It’s not until he turns a corner that Rey loses him, but a moment later a hand shoots out from a small alleyway and grabs her wrist, pulling her face-to-face with Ren again.

The disguise she’s wearing covers the bottom half of her face, so she’s free to scowl at him as she struggles to figure out what to say. The alleyway is so narrow that she could easily reach out and touch him, pulling his hood away so that she could run her fingers through his hair and—

No, that’s not right. She is absolutely _not_ thinking about all the things they could do in this tiny, dirty alleyway with a street full of beings only a couple of meters away.

Except that she can’t stop herself from wondering what it would be like to have him again. To her everlasting shame, she’s conjured a number of fantasies about things she’d like to do to him. Judging from how tense his Force signature is, she’s not alone.

Neither of them wants to be the one to speak first. He hasn’t let go of her wrist, but his grip is loose enough that she could easily pull away if she wanted to. And she does want to, of course; he’s her enemy and letting him touch her at all is dangerous. Her traitorous body, on the other hand, wants his other hand on her, too.

Ren is the one to break the silence first. “Hello, scavenger,” he says, voice muffled through the mask he’s wearing.

She glares at him. “I have a name, you know. And take that stupid thing off. If you’re going to insult me, don’t do it from behind a mask.”

“Or you’ll what?” The smirk is evident in his tone, and she feels her cheeks heat when she realizes there’s no rational way to explain why she wants to see his face.

She finally pulls her wrist away from his grip, trying to ignore the way her skin burns where he’d touched it. “What are you doing here?”

He waits for a dramatic pause before he says, “Why would I tell you? We’re enemies, remember?” He steps closer, backing her against the wall. “Or did you forget after last time we were alone together?”

“Nothing happened, remember?” she says, the words coming out in a rasp from the way her throat is suddenly dry.

“So you followed me out of a crowded marketplace and down an empty alleyway to have a repeat of nothing happening,” he drawls.

“Shut the fuck up, Ren.”

“Make me.”

_Well, he asked,_ she thinks as she rips his stupid disguise up and off of his head so that she can get her lips on his. He groans, pressing her up against the wall and fuck, he’s already so hard, his erection pressing against her lower belly. She would tease him about it if she weren’t in a similar state, her arousal building off of his. She couldn’t hide this in the Force even if she tried; if she wasn’t so horny, she’d start to worry about the heightened connection they share.

This is a terrible idea, but she makes no move to stop him as he slides a hand up under her shirt, groping her breast. It seems like he has no idea what he’s doing until he pulls her shirt up, exposing her breasts completely so that he can have a better view. He hasn’t removed his gloves, and the leather provides a sensation that’s completely unlike anything she’s felt when she’s done this to herself.

“Your tits are perfect,” he breathes, looking down to watch his hands groping them in a manner that doesn’t feel terrible, but doesn’t do much for her, either.

She doubts he meant to let that slip; as much as she’d like to ignore the idea of Ren finding anything appealing about her, she can’t help herself. “Is it my tits you like, or are you so self-involved you just want to watch your own hands?”

He growls; apparently, words are beyond him, because he bends down to take one in his mouth. The inept groping may not have been effective, but the way he flicks his tongue over her nipple makes her nerves spark all the way through her core. He moves to her other breast, his still-gloved thumb teasing her nipple to a peak.

Ren shifts his weight, repositioning them so that his thigh is wedged between her legs while his mouth is busy leaving little bite marks all over her breasts. She can’t stop herself from writhing against him, desperate to appease the tension in her core.

If she comes from this, she’s either going to be humiliated or satisfied. It’s a toss-up.

The tiebreaker is feeling Ren’s satisfaction in the Force as she comes to this conclusion, and he doubles down on his assault on her breasts, grinding his thigh against her core. She pushes him away, refusing to give him the satisfaction of making her come fully-clothed, but before he can get the wrong idea, she reaches for his belt.

* * *

It’s a sheer coincidence that Kylo and Rey happened to be in the same crowded marketplace at the same time. Despite the facial coverings, it would be impossible to miss her. She and Finn—no, the traitor, she’s just a scavenger and he’s just a traitor and Kylo needs to remember that—shine like beacons in the Force. It makes him livid that he can’t stop himself from gravitating towards them and he can’t bring himself to bring them to his master to be Kylo’s replacement.

He’d left the marketplace knowing she’d follow him, then at the first opportunity, he trapped her in an alleyway with him.

( _Trapped._ He’s the one who can’t keep away from her; why does he think he has her trapped?)

It’s gratifying to know that Rey hasn’t had enough of him—at least in this manner. There’s a sick thrill he gets out of knowing he’s had both Rey and Finn; given how thick Rey’s shame is at nearly coming undone against his thigh, he doubts she’s confided in her friend about what she did in the woods with Kylo, which also means that Finn hasn’t confided in her, either.

As bad as Kylo wants to be buried deep inside her tight, hot cunt, he can’t give in without teasing her. “You want my cock so badly you’re about to get fucked against a wall where anyone could see,” he whispers, holding her wrists in place so that she can’t distract him by reaching for his belt again. “What do you think they’d do if they turned down here and saw how wet you are for me?” He’s satisfied to know that this is a claim he can make for certain; he could feel how hot and wet she was on his thigh.

She shudders; apparently, the scavenger has an exhibitionism kink. He’s briefly reminded of the times he’s fantasized about watching Rey and Finn together, but no, now is certainly not the time to think about it. As she’s gained mastery over the Force, the connection between them has strengthened, whether they like it or not. There’s a real risk she could listen to his thoughts if she tried hard enough, and he likes the thrill of being both Rey’s and Finn’s dirty little secret while they’re completely unaware.

“That depends on whether you can follow through with your threats or not,” she retorts.

He might laugh if he had more blood flowing through his head. “Threats?” he repeats. “I meant them as promises.”

She pulls her wrists out of his grip. “If you’re just going to listen to yourself speak, I’m leaving.”

_Wait, no, stay_ — Somehow he manages to stop himself from actually saying the words aloud; instead, he kisses her again. This is better. After all, the only reason he doesn’t want her to leave is because of the sex.

Right?

He’s spared from having to think about it any further with the way she deepens the kiss, forcing him to open his mouth so that she can sweep her tongue through it. Her hands are back at his belt; he gets the message and takes over while she pulls away so that she’s facing away from him.

He’s not disappointed that he won’t be able to see her face when she comes. He’s _not._

Fucking Rey for the second time is no less satisfying than the first. She has to slap her hand over her mouth to muffle her moan when she pushes into her. Her shirt is still bunched up over her tits, giving his hand something to do other than grip her hips.

She’s going to walk away from this full of his cum and covered in his bitemarks and that shouldn’t be so satisfying and yet it _is_. It sets off some proud, possessive part of him that he didn’t realize existed after years spent following the Jedi path and then at the mercy of Master Snoke. But now’s not the time to think about that, either.

“Is that all you’ve got?” she asks breathlessly. He’s not exactly being gentle, but apparently that’s not enough for her. He angles himself for better leverage, then starts pounding harder, like he actually wants to hurt her.

(Well, obviously he wants to hurt her. He is a monster, after all.)

Fuck, she’s so hot and tight and wet and he’s losing his mind over this woman and he absolutely _cannot_ come before she does. His pride won’t allow it. He abandons her breast in favor of reaching down between her legs. It’s a shame he didn’t think to remove his gloves—he desperately wants to feel how wet she is—but he’s not going to pause now. And anyway, she seems to like the texture, judging from the way she clenches and _oh_ that feels so good. Too good. He rubs her clit harder.

“You’re trying not to come, aren’t you?” The taunt would land harder if she wasn’t so breathless. “I can feel you trying not to lose your mind right now.”

She’s right. There’s a spark of humiliation that tips him over the edge and he has to bite her shoulder to muffle his groan while he comes so hard that he sees stars.

Even without the Force, it’s obvious that Rey is pissed that he came before she did. He doesn’t blame her, truth be told, so he does the only thing that his fucked-out brain can come up with and gets down on his knees, tugging her trousers down and tugging off one of her boots so that he can turn her around and throw her leg over his shoulder while he eats her cunt like he’s a starving man.

He’s never done this before, but it’s easy to tell what she needs with the way they’re connected in the Force. Her body language makes it clear, too; she tugs his hair to position him exactly where she needs him to be while she rides his face.

If they get arrested for public indecency over this, it will be so worth it.

He feels zero shame cleaning her up like this; as hot as it is to think about her running back to her precious Resistance with his cum dripping down her thighs, he can taste exactly how well-fucked she is.

Rey feels about as much shame at using him for this, eventually holding him in place while she fucks his face. With her head thrown back, he still can’t see what she looks like when she comes, but there’s not much room for disappointment at the moment.

When she’s finally pushing him away after the last aftershocks have faded, he makes a show of wiping her off his face while making eye contact. They’re both still breathing hard, but the sound of a commotion nearby pushes them into action as they hastily redress in silence.

“This doesn’t—” Rey says, reusing to look at him while she pulls her boot back on.

“Change anything,” he finishes, readjusting his own clothing to look less disheveled. “Obviously.”

“So…” The hesitation in her tone prompts him to look at her again. “What, is this going to be a thing? Fucking in forests and dirty back alleyways?”

He’s surprised that she’s the one bringing this up. “You’re not going to be able to fuck me back from the dark side.”

She glares at him. Good, they’re back on familiar ground. That’ll make it easier to have this conversation. “What, like your cock can make me switch sides, too? I’m not that naive, Kylo.”

It’s the first time she’s called him anything other than Ren. He’s not sure what that means. If it even means anything. It probably doesn’t. And it’s certainly not the worst thing she could call him.

“And yet you like it enough to come back for more,” he retorts.

Theoretically, this is good. He’s supposed to be convincing her to join him and come back to the First Order with him to join the dark side, and orgasms can make for some damn good motivation. But he doesn’t want to do this if it’s just going to become sex punctuated by arguments over who’s switching sides.

And he wants to keep doing this. He wants it so much it almost hurts. Neither of them is willing to be the first one to cave, but it’s obvious what they’re both thinking.

Fuck. This is not how _any_ of this is supposed to go.

* * *

They part ways without actually coming to an agreement about whether they’re going to keep fucking, which is probably a good thing because Rey doesn’t have the energy to lie to herself right now.

She attempts to sweep all memories of the encounter under the rug before she’s even left Batuu airspace, but all of her efforts are futile when she catches sight of herself in the mirror after showering later on and sees the marks Kylo left all over her chest. Nothing her shirts won’t hide, of course, but it’s difficult to deny that something happened when the evidence is written across her skin and in the soreness between her legs.

Once she gets back to the Resistance’s base, she’s met with another complication in the form of Finn when she realizes she can’t meet his eyes once the mission debrief is over.

It’s just. She’s felt how Kylo is being torn apart from the inside. Luke never said much when she and Finn were on Ahch-To, but she knows they never got the whole story of what happened the night Ben Solo became Kylo Ren. Not for the first time, she’s wondering what, exactly, Luke left out.

Maybe Ben Solo isn’t as dead as Kylo claims.

This is the sort of thing that Rey would love to discuss with Finn. He’s met Kylo. He was with her on Ahch-To. He’s sure to have plenty to say about this. And yet she can’t find a way to bring Kylo—Ben—up in conversation with Finn without revealing why she’s thinking about him.

Just as Rey’s connection to Kylo is strengthening as she gains mastery over the Force, so is her connection to Finn. “What’s wrong?” he asks when she meets him in the training room at their usual time the day after she ran into Kylo on Batuu.

Rey knows she doesn’t _look_ any different—not when she’s fully-clothed, anyway; the bite marks have yet to fade—but she blushes to the roots of her hair anyway. “It’s nothing,” she says, starting her usual warm-up stretches. She’s still sore from getting fucked up against a wall yesterday, but it’s not like she’s never trained while sore. Even if this is a different kind of sore than she’s used to.

She catches sight of Finn’s expression and sighs. “Fine, it’s not nothing,” she admits. “But it’s something I’m not ready to talk about.”

The way Finn’s expression shuts down makes Rey hate herself a little bit. “Okay,” he replies. “I can respect that.”

“I’ll tell you when I’m ready,” she promises him.

He nods. “You’re entitled to your own secrets.” The way he says it makes it sound like he’s talking about himself as well. He’s also exuding the same kind of tension that Rey is certain she’s giving off right now. If Rey is hiding her new history with Kylo, what is Finn hiding?

She has no right to ask that. Not when she’s unwilling to admit her own misdeeds.


End file.
